Electric Shock

Dear Projector,

I have been exchanging fake smiles with the same American guy for three hours now. He thinks I am listening. If I haven’t been scrolling up and down to look at the movies I recently downloaded (while wondering which one I should see first), I would have been thrice as bored.

I told you to stay still and give me a wide shot while he speaks. (That way my horizontally-challenged body would not be exposed in a wildly unaesthetic way.)

You took it quite seriously. Your friend, Camera, must be having a stiff neck. She hasn’t moved in three straight hours too. Can you imagine smelling her Efficascent Oil-scented long legged legs later before she decides to lie down?

The American guy is very much like that person on TV who spoke only two words: change and America. Same voice pitch. Same dark gray suit. Same tongue, even. Glad he did not stick it out when he saw me doing the same thing.

Hey Projector, how are you hanging up? Hahaha. You have been suspended for an entire day. At twelve, we took our lunch. But you didn’t. Are you trying to impress the boss?

Look at Laptop. Her butt is as flat as Screen Projector’s. Who apparently took a lot of time deciding what to wear today. Every hour, she changes shades. Blue. Green. Yellow. It seems to me that every time she does, music is playing in the background. Is this what they call love?

You should have seen Cable today. Oh, wait. He passed by you. Literally. Hehehe! The guy’s got new arm and leg warmers. Orange, like that of the one running for president. But when I went to the john, Socket told me that he got ‘burnt’. Perhaps by a careless user.

I see you still have your lights on. I am just glad, they’re not red. Or else I would have stopped pissing you off. Weee.

The American stopped talking. Perhaps he got bored as well. Told you he doesn’t like Spot stalking him all the way to the corner of the stage. Poor spot. Always a failure when it comes to stalking.

Funny because Mike told me to stop blabbering and instead support him. I told him, “Hey Mike, just because I am your best friend doesn’t mean I have to catch you on your ass all the time.” Heehaha!

Wanting very much to stay in the corner,
MikeStand

*Kaboring na gid sang convention. Ginasulod na sang nanovirus ang utok ko. T__T

‘Attack life, it’s going to kill you anyway.’

Sometimes, I think of myself as a boring person. Mga 30% boring ako. I think. So I make up for it by being crazy through computer-mediated communication. Because I don’t want to be boring. It’s boring.

HAHAHAHAHA.

So, kung may mga araw na hindi maganda yung gising ko, I try to look for something which can shoo away the boredom and monotone of what’s about to happen. I ask stupid questions on Formspring, annoy people, write unfinished stories and EAT. Anything to pick up something to do and think about.

Like now, I should be writing a press release for Michaelmas, a Christian celebration (for one of our clients). But I am too bored to even click open Microsoft Word. And perhaps because of the need to be inspired, I looked for sites which house funny anecdotes and inspirational thoughts. Kind of like a virtual brain hopping.

And the title of this post got me interested. :)

attaaackk!

Russia Day 2011

Yesterday, I spent about twelve hours at work.

It was the Russia Day Celebration. The 35th Year Anniversary of celebrating the Philippine-Russian relations. With the collaboration of Consul Armi Lopez Garcia, Philippine-Russian Business Assembly, Russian Ambassador Nikolay Kudashev and the Province of Cebu and PR Works Cebu, a press conference, photo exhibit and a small cocktail party were held at the Waterfront Cebu City Hotel and Casino.

Despite the downpour and the late advisory, almost of the invite media were in attendance. In fact, the scheduled press con took almost an hour and 15 minutes. The photo exhibit followed suit. The photos were a collage of events attended by Consul Armi Lopez Garcia, HE Nikolay Kudashev and the Phiippine-Russian Business Assembly. At the back of the panels were various photos taken by famous Russian photographers. The exhibit will last for a week.

So, if you have time and money for a plane/boat ticket, visit the lobby of Cebu Waterfront Cebu City Hotel and get lost in thought. Hehehehe. [Darn. I just remembered that I wasn't able to take a picture of my favorite photo there.]

Cafe UNO served as the venue for the mini cocktail party. A simple program was held, messages and toasts here and there, and of course, there was a lot of bright lights, clinking and clicking sounds and “Hahaha!”

I was proud to say that I didn’t get bored. As one of the organizers of that event, boredom is a constant battle that I have to fight off. Thankfully, this one wasn’t. There was a lot of things to prepare for and a lot of people to juggle.

Though most of us went home dead tired from too much physical activity, I wasn’t really exhausted.
I am seeing him. :)

Photos of the event:

during the press conference with Dmitry Yudin, HE Nikolay Kudashev and Consul Armi Lopez Garcia

during the photo exhibit

two ‘Russian girls’ holding a tray containing bread and salt, following the Russian Welcome Tradition of Bread and Salt

during the cocktail party

lost in thought

These days I feel like the younger, unenlightened version of Siddharta Gautama. I have searched for answers but I do not seem to know the kind of questions to ask.

I feel like there is something lacking in everything I do, and no social networking site can give me the pleasure I need. I have searched for that something but it does not seem to know that I exist.

Ah, nagte-thesis na talaga ako.

Sir Tom, in one of our classes said, “Critical thinking begins from realizing that you are trapped in a situation which you want to get away from”. Right now, I have seen and felt the application of this quotation and it makes me feel all the more helpless.

All the books I read, the recess I’m taking, the websites I am visiting, stayed as what they were originally: panandaliang aliw. They can never take away the gravity of reality. They can try, but more often than not, they do not succeed. Sometimes, they aggravate the situation.

If the enlightenment I’m searching for were a mosquito, it might have sucked thousands of cc of blood in my body already. I’m sure it’s just right there, hiding in some dark corner. When I can finally see it, I swear I will abuse it. 

dateless days

I do not know if it is just me but when I am at home, he days are dateless. Especially if I am too busy minding my world, I do not have the ability of knowing what the day’s date is—even if there are events tied to them or not.

Does it have to do with living in a rural area? Or am I just too self-absorbed? Hehehe.

I remember once, the summer before I would turn to a high school senior, electricity had gone out for almost a whole week. I was totally “jobless”. I have read and reread all my interesting books, watched all the feel-good movies and pestered my dogs until they no longer considered me canine-friendly, but I am definitely bored. What made it worst was I was isolated (read: made to watch our store since I was the only one honest and patient enough—aside from mother—to do so) from the rest of the family from 1PM-4PM.

But it was still deadly boring. Not many of our neighbours are buying daily kitchen paraphernalia because of the heavy rain. Good thing I had my mother’s Walkman. Days after that, I can already memorize the radio programs of Campus, name the DJ’s and retell the songs which have played for more than thrice a day. Oh, the things that boredom can do.

Then, I was very eager if my mother sends me to errands in town. Even if they were all fairly simple and effortless, I considered them as great boredom advertisements. If I can, I would write or take leisurely walks in the neighbourhood. Just to kill time.

Now that I am on the last semester before I graduate and there are only three days before school officially starts, the dateless days are almost over. It’s time to rip the curtain that hides reality and slap the hell out of its cruel face. LOL.

add-ons

Just for fun: There are nine dots here. Connect all of them using four, consecutive (continuous and without break or stop) strokes only. A dot should not be stroked twice.

Clue: “Look beyond what you see”.

° ° °

° ° °

° ° °

P.S. It wouldn’t hurt to try, especially if you’re bored… like me. Hahaha!

how to annoy others, effectively

This is a skill if one does it impeccably, but is not irritating all the time. Sometimes, the need to irritate people is a necessity if you’re a b*tch, if you feel like it, if you are too friendly or if you need to get somebody out of your circle.

1. No parties. Stay at home and sleep early.
2. Be physically present and mentally absent.
3. The opposite of number two, be a “know-it-all”.
4. Nag and speak like you are dealing with kids.
5. Close the lid of your reactions. Keep the face stony.
6. Limit your adjectives and praises.
7. Talk about uninteresting topic.
8. Talk about yourself in a monotonous voice.
9. Violate expectations.
10. Say no to arcade games, ferris wheel rides and other outdoor games.
11. Stick to the rules.
12. Drink water while the others are drinking soda and drone on about the unhealthy benefits of soft drinks.
13. Suck up to the teacher.
14. Give yourself the credit even when it is a group work.
15. Defend yourself—only.
16. Act sleepy all the time.
17. Do not share.
18. Offer food but keep up the “I-do-not-want-to-share-but-status-quo-made-me-do-it” glare.
19. Do not close the lid.
20. Plan but do not attend.
21. Bang the door and leave it open.
22. Wake up and turn on the lights even when it’s 2AM, your roommate is still asleep and you have nothing to do.
23. Sing on the top of your lungs nightly.
24. Be tactless.
25. Be insensitive and do not say sorry.
26. Do not attend meetings.
27. Lie.
28. Eat slowly when they are waiting for you but nag others to eat fast.
29. Speak like you’re angry all the time.
30. Borrow and never return.
31. Turn your back away from the one you are talking to.
32. Repeating everything you say in a girlish, high-pitched voice.
33. Use Number 1-32 in a day—excessively.
34. There are a lot more but it will be irritating if I put them all here.

If this is a job, a lot of people will be multi-millionaires by now.
(photo taken from i.thestreet.com)

how i trained my dragon of a boredom

I love watching movies alone. This might sound a bit selfish (if Jennie reads this, I’m dead), but there’s a little possibility that I will sleep while the movie is going on if I’m alone.

So this lazy Wednesday, sunk back in my Viking-like bed, fingers poised to double-click on a movie I have yet to watch. I chanced upon “How to train your dragon”, and remembering it was my friend Wila’s insistent wish for me to watch it, i decided to give the movie justice.

It was one of those movies which you would want to repeat even if you watched it awhile ago. It seems that there’s always a certain angle from which you can watch it without automatically guessing what will happen next.

What I especially love about the movie was—though most films have this ingredient—that there is always a deviant (usually opinion-shy at first) who stands up to his ideals and saves the world—in the most unconventional way. (Well, who says dragons are conventional?)

Subtly, however, the thought that the underlying cause of all of Hiccup’s efforts is winning Astrid’s heart seldom crosses my mind. BUT, it does not affect my total judgment of the movie’s effect on me—I will definitely watch it again.

P.S. Without food or drinks, the rain is a good alternative for a movie companion. I also found out that Jay Baruchel and Gerard Butler voiced Hiccup and his father, Chief Stoick the Vast, the tribe chieftain. Hmmm…another reason to watch the movie again and again. :D

The effect of having a pen, paper and a boring teacher

Out of boredom, and perhaps of the bored air that’s coming out of the equally bored air conditioning unit that might be bored by the boring voice of our boring teacher, I made a short story.

And it’s not boring, by the way. 

We found ourselves talking about first loves that were you and me. Your eyes still smile at me with the affection that was sixteen years ago, but with the sparkle gone.

The swing that held us creaked with age, but the ‘Rea <3 Louie’ did not grow with time.

You told me about this new guy and asked about my love. My response, surprisingly calmed the both of us.

When the sun left the sky, I realized that my love for you had been long gone, too, even when you kissed my blushing cheek to say goodbye.

Until now I smile, when before you left with that stolen kiss, you whispered, “Thank you, Father.”

It is not as compelling or as tear-jerking as other sad short stories but I think it made up for a class I did not pay much attention to.

what boredom can do to a weird, genderless person

So i’m bored on a Wednesday.

no food.
no drink.
slow internet connection.
humid atmosphere.
grainy television.
still asleep friends.
no load.
no engaging book.
no interesting chat with an interesting person.
(brain freeze due to heat)

what’s a Homo Sapien to do?